Learning Time Management avec bebe

Oh how many of us on the planet have abandoned blogs in cyberspace? Please say I am not the only one. I suspect I am not and am, in fact, in very good company. Well, here I am. And am now aiming for once a week posts. Is that realistic? With a 9 month old now crawling and planning a move out of the country? We'll see.
Between all the books on new motherhood and all the Baby Center emails, I see a lot of headlines about achieving balance and giving yourself a break. None of it really says anything new. Most of it, I think, is kind of misleading. The whole notion of achieving balance makes it sound like you'll never be exhausted if you just attain the right balance of things. Silliness.
I see even more in the books on new motherhood on giving up all the expectations of perfection because these are where suffering come from. This I do agree with. I think a big reason why I started a blog only to abandon it is because I had grand expectations of the kinds of things I would be able to write (long well researched well written thoughtful and thought provoking essays on fine details no one had ever thought of before). I'm slowly coming to peace with that for me to write means I just have to stay up late at night, and often at night, I'm rather at the end of my rope as my dad says. Or I'm not but I want to snuggle with my cute sleeping baby. Or with my cute sleeping husband. Or I just want a shower.
I did realize for not the first time that I am a victim of perfectionism. I want to create the perfect thing/novel/story/piece of art, but when I don't know how to do that or don't think I'm even coming close, I give up. Probably, the gift of a baby is that he is not something I can give up on. And I don't have to be perfect, and really, it's easier for a lot of us if I'm not. So rather than long eloquent, thoughtful essays on the tidbits of motherhood, probably about once a week or so, I'll write a short choppy odd observation on myself in motherhood. It might read like my high school biology lab notebook: "I don't know if I put the right thing in my petri dish". Or "dissected the frog. While there is an odd beauty to it, I never want to do it again."
But this week in my notebook, I did think of the beginning of quite a few essays. So I do have things to go back to work on. Things I haven't seen in the books on new motherhood or baby center emails. Like what do you do about children's Bible stories? On the one hand I want my son to have the mythology, on the other I don't want him smiting kids on the playground because they seem wicked. Or on breastfeeding mothers donating milk. There's quite a few of us who donate milk, but I haven't seen anything that really talks about that. Or for pete's sake, post partum in laws and dealing with them while you are also dealing with hormones (and what kind of cruel joke is that?) And postpartum sex? People really don't talk about that. So anyway, I have a lot of things I could work on. But first, I'm taking that shower since the husband and baby are asleep.